Carlisle 3 Piece Luggage SetCarlisle 3 Piece Luggage Set

The Perfect Way To Pack For Your Staycation

If you’re a free spirit looking for a set of luggage that can withstand the rigors of traveling the globe… well, you’re not shopping here today. Go see if you like what’s at Sellout instead.

If, however, you’re the sort of person who just needs some luggage that will mostly just be sitting in the trunk while you drive, consider the Carlisle 3 Piece Luggage Set. After all, not everyone is going to need the same level of protection.

The Carlisle 3 Piece Luggage Set is made with a relatively durable 600D polyester fabric. That means it’ll do okay, but will certainly show wear and tear faster than those high-end luggage sets. But you probably don’t really… we mean, how often do you… okay, just we’ll put it nicely. A lot of our customers don’t get out much. For most of you, a really expensive luggage set would just really expensively sit in the closet.

A Carlisle 3 Piece Luggage Set, though… well, that might just sit in the closet too. But at least it will sit there so much more cheaply. Instead of a pile of expensive luggage, you’ll have a 25” spinner upright pullman, a 20” spinner carry-on Upright, and a shoulder tote bag, plus a whole bunch of other stuff that you’ll have been able to buy with the money you saved when you chose a Carlisle 3 Piece Luggage Set instead of, you know, something good.

We all know that if you’re the guy in charge of smuggling doctored passports between Microsoft and The Vatican, you’ll be buying a top-of-the-line indestructible Oscar Goldman style briefcase. However, if all you need is a place to put t-shirts on the ten minute drive to your Mom’s house because you promised to watch her poodle during the week she’s in Barbados, the Carlisle 3 Piece Luggage Set is the perfect luggage set for you.

Also makes a great thing for your cat to destroy! Show your cat you love them with a Carlisle 3 Piece Luggage Set! Cheaper than a scratching post! Feels more forbidden! Possibly dangerous to the cat! What a perfect gift!

Warranty: 90 Day Woot Limited Warranty

Features:

• Durable 600D polyester fabric
• Full polyester lining keeps your contents neat and protected
• Nylon coil zippers
• PVC coating for water resistance
• 360 degree whirlwind wheel system
• Retractable handles
• Top and bottom handles for convenience

Additional Photos:

• Black 3 Piece Set
• Black 25” Spinner Upright Pullman
• Black 20” Spinner Carry-on Upright
• Black Shoulder Tote
• Black 360 degree whirlwind wheel system
• Black Bottom Handle
• Purple 3 Piece Set
• Purple 25” Spinner Upright Pullman
• Purple 20” Spinner Carry-on Upright
• Purple Shoulder Tote
• Purple 360 degree whirlwind wheel system
• Purple Bottom Handle
• Red 3 Piece Set
• Red 25” Spinner Upright Pullman
• Red 20” Spinner Carry-on Upright
• Red Shoulder Tote
• Red 360 degree whirlwind wheel system
• Red Bottom Handle

In the box:

• 25” Spinner Upright Pullman
• 20” Spinner Carry-on Upright
• Shoulder Tote

Corona Clipper Fusion Handheld Multi-Tool – 2 PackCorona Clipper Fusion Handheld Multi-Tool – 2 Pack

...But Seriously

Sweaty puppet caricatures not included

I must’ve pruned a thousand shrubs
I clipped ‘em down to stumpy stubs
And I can open bottles too
Among other things I can do

‘Cause did you see the Woot today?
I bought that thingy right away
It’s just the thing a fellow needs
To cut stuff and to pull up weeds

There’s too many men
Too many people
Facing too many problems
Without this tool that I’ve found
Can’t you see? This is a Corona Fusion

This is the wire stripper
And this here is the bag ripper
Use them around your house, it’s
Amazing you lived without this tool

A Leatherman this ain’t, that’s true
But it comes at less expense to you
And plus it has a sprinkler tool
Which, frankly, I find pretty cool

This here’s a saw
And this here’s a ruler
Hurry, click if you want one
‘Cause we don’t have tons to go ‘round
Dunno why; it’s just a Corona Fusion

Warranty: Lifetime Corona

Features:

• 3" blade cuts though small braches and twigs
• Handheld stainless steel pruning blade
• Cut cleanly and resists rust
• Compact folding design
• Nylon pouch with belt loop, keep it on your hip for easy access
• Easy to use thumb lock keeps the blades locked in to prevent accidental injury
• Measures 4 1/2" long when folded in on itself

11 tools in 1:

• Bypass pruner
• Wire cutter
• Bottle opener
• Wire stripper
• Sprinkler Tool
• Saw
• Weeder
• Ruler
• Point blade knife
• Bag ripper
• Half serrated knife

Additional Photos:

• Corona Clipper MT5911 Fusion 11 Multi-Tool
• Bypass Pruner
• Saw

In the box:

• 2 Corona Clipper MT5911 Fusion 11 Multi-Tools

iRobot Roomba 530 Robotic Vacuum with Virtual WalliRobot Roomba 530 Robotic Vacuum with Virtual Wall

And It Wouldn’t Hurt To Grow A Beard, Either

You don’t NEED a closetful of CHARISMA!

You don’t need a TRUNKLOAD of TALENT and you don’t even need any CHARM! Hi! Willie Blay here for CHUTZPAH, the revolutionary new way to do things that’ll change the WAY you DO THINGS - forever! That’s the Chutzpah promise!

How much would YOU pay for the secret to FORTUNE and FAME for those of us not blessed with any special physical or mental gifts? Four dollars? Eighteen dollars? Five billion dollars? I can do better than that: I’m giving the secret away FREE! It’s not like I need the money where I’m going! The secret is CHUTZPAH, a groundbreaking new formula that unlocks the power of sheer NERVE to pave the way to a richer, more confident, and richer you!

It’s all in not caring what people think! Remember this acronym: HGH! It stands for “Haters Gonna Hate”, and it reminds you that some people just LOVE to make themselves look SMARTER by tearing down OTHERS! What do you care what some overeducated copywriter from St. Louis thinks of you? The answer is YOU DON’T! If that guy was so smart, he’d be living in a fabulous MANSION like yours instead of a vinyl-siding shack in St. Louis!

Remember another acronym: RAA! That stands for “Remember Another Acronym”! And the acronym I’m talking about there is ABC: Always Be Chutzpahing! Here, let me demonstrate.

Take a normal, everyday e-commerce customer – that’s you! Then take a pretty typical household product: a Roomba 530 Robotic Vacuum! When you’ve got CHUTZPAH, that Roomba becomes a “full-service household valet”! Its counter-rotating Bristle Brush and Beater Brush magically transform into “two dynamite blasts against carpet-bound crud”! The Spot Clean and Dirt Detect functions? “Advanced artificial intelligence scanning your environment for foreign contaminants”! A minute ago, you were about to fall asleep – now you can’t click that “I WANT ONE” button fast enough. THAT’s the POWER of Chutzpah!

Seeing is believing, am I right? You put in the hours like me and you can be a HOUSEHOLD NAME like me, with the fortune to match! It’s all in the CHUTZPAH! But wait! Call now and I’ll triple my offer at no extra cost to you! No, that doesn’t make any sense – but it doesn’t have to make sense when you’ve got CHUTZPAH! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to move on to another mortal plane. You call it the afterlife – I call it a brand-new market! I just hope they have blue shirts up there!

Warranty: 90 Day iRobot

Transformers 4 Foot Wall GraphixTransformers 4 Foot Wall Graphix

Yet Still Better Than Skylynx

“This is a great place, Jack! I can’t believe I’m in a Transformers bar! Look at that Mega-Size Gamer Graffix Wall Sticker! It’s like, four feet tall!”

“Yeah, I know. It’s great. It’s like you’re really in the room with Bumblebee and Optimus Prime. I’m here all the time, it’s a great place. But Doug, you know, keep in mind that the staff is-”

“I know, I know. Mostly Transfomers. Everything here’s ‘more than meets the eye’. I’m not exactly a novice at this, Jack. I used to have a Megatron that turned into a gun. Hey, I’m gonna get us some drinks. Bartender? Bartender?”

WHAT WILL YOU HAVE HANDSOME

“Wow, you’re the hottest bartender I’ve ever seen! You look just like Megan Fox!”

THANKS HONEY EVERYONE SAYS SO

“This place is so cool. Hey, give me two beers… and your phone number!”

HA HA HA COMING RIGHT UP SWEET TALKER

“Hey, Jack! Check out the bartender! She looks just like Megan Fox! And she thinks I’m funny! She’s got a really husky voice, though. Think she smokes?”

“Doug, maybe you should-”

“Look at her. I gotta go for it, man. You don’t mind, right?”

“Doug, listen, this is a Transformer bar. Transformers. Those four foot tall stickers made from high quality fiber and high resolution printing…”

“Jack, I can see the Mega-Size Gamer Graffix Wall Stickers plainly. They’re huge, you can’t miss them. It’s like the next generation in posters and they can go on any flat surface and are easy to remove or reapply. It’s pretty obvious where I am.”

“Okay, well, you’re my friend and I’m not gonna judge you but… you’re sure you know what you’re doing?”

“Jack, I’m an old pro. She’s totally into me already. I can’t just let this pass me by.”

Okay, well, if it’s what you want… I’ll just go sit over by either Optimus Prime or Bumblebee, then. You go… do whatever it is you think you’re doing. Good luck, Doug.”

“Hey, thanks, Jack! Oh, are these my drinks, babe?”

YOU KNOW IT, SWEETIE

“Listen, I can’t help but notice… are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see. Here, I bought this one just for you.”

HA HA HA HA YOU ARE SO SMOOTH AND FUNNY AND CUTE TOO

“Yeah, you too. You’re even hotter than the Mega-Size Gamer Graffix Wall Stickers over there. Say, what time do you get off work? Cause I was thinking you and me could have a little fun tonight.”

OH WOW REALLY I DIDN’T THINK YOU WERE THAT TYPE

“Type? Babe, I’m all about hot bartenders. Hey, why don’t you come out here so I can take a good look at you?”

OF COURSE LET ME JUST WALK OVER THERE TO YOUR SIDE OF THE BAR

“Yeah, you look just like Megan Fox. As though you made yourself up to look just like her on purpose. Wow. I can’t believe how exact… wait a minute…”

WHAT DO YOU THINK CUTIE I FILL THESE TIGHT PANTS PRETTY GOOD HUH

“Wait… is that… are those your keys or something? Or a flashlight?”

NO HONEY. THIS IS A TRANSFORMER BAR, REMEMBER? I’M JUST MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE.

“You’re more than… oh my god. Jack! Jack!”

LISTEN I’M ABOUT TO GO ON LUNCH WHY DON’T WE SNEAK OUT TO MY CAR AND THEN WE CAN TRANSFER THE MATRIX OF LEADERSHIP IF YOU FOLLOW ME

“I don’t… I mean, I thought… Jack! Jaaaaaaack!”

Warranty: No Warranty

Features:

• Huge four foot tall wall poster
• Three dimensional graphic designs
• Easily applied to any flat surface for decorative use
• Easy to remove and reapply, won’t damage walls
• Consists of high quality carbon fiber and undergo high resolution printing to provide sharp colors and three dimensional depth
• Reusable and repositionable wall graphics
• Your choice of Optimus Prime or Bumblebee

Dimensions:

• Optimus Prime Design Size: 30X48 inches (4 Feet tall)
• Bumblebee Design. Size: 30X48 inches (4 Feet tall)

In the box:

• 4 Foot Tall Wall Graphix

20” LCD Monitor with DVI20” LCD Monitor with DVI

There’s a certain monitor manufacturer we’ve loved for a long, long time

What’s its name? We can’t tell you. (AWWWW)

What’s in a name, anyway? Some dude once said that a rose, if you called it something else, would still smell the same. Of course, if you called it “Intestinal Stenchweed,” no one would sniff one to find out. That’s kind of what’s going on with this monitor. It boasts respectable specs—20-inch TFT Active Matrix display, VGA analog and DVI-D digital inputs—but y’all don’t care. You just want to know who’s the manufacturer. You’re too brand-oriented in your thinking, is what you are.

You know what chafes our bunions? When we go out on the town and we see materialistic youngsters in t-shirts emblazoned with designer brand names. The reason the brand name has any cachet in the first place is because it identifies a company that, in theory, makes finer-quality merchandise. The t-shirt isn’t finer-quality merchandise. It’s just a t-shirt. But it’s got this name on it, as if the wearer hopes you’ll think he or she has class, or something. That he or she appreciates the finer things. Upscale names. Luxury brands.

We always wonder why, if these t-shirt-wearers are so into luxury, they aren’t dressed in anything nicer than t-shirts.

Anyway, a truly fine item doesn’t need to splash its brand name everywhere. Its quality speaks for itself. Not that this monitor is “a truly fine item,” really. We just got off on a tangent there. But it is pretty nice, especially if you’re looking to expand into a dual-monitor desktop set-up. Ooh, or even triple!

Warranty: 90 Day Woot Limited Warranty

Acer Aspire Core2 Duo 16″ NotebookAcer Aspire Core2 Duo 16″ Notebook

Nice Helicopter, Mom

Hello? Hello? Is this Whoops? I’d like to speak to your CEO, please.

Well, okay, I’ll hold then. Oh, meetings all day? Well, look, my child has just got a job at your little company, and I’ve been doing some research into what goes on there. I think you could use a little help with the Whoops business model. So I got out my 16” Acer Aspire and made a little list. I was going to read it to your CEO, but I guess I’ll read it to you instead. Do you have something to write this down on?

First of all, I think your company should be a bit more empowering in regards to their new employees. I got this idea from the empowering key that’s on my Acer Aspire. All I have to do is push it and this really neat on-screen dock slides down, giving me access to lots of important computer settings. Based on that, I was thinking that if you had some sort of program which allowed new hires to actually run the company for a day, that would probably benefit everyone. I know my daughter would make a great leader. Did you know that, when she was three, she used to line up all her teddy bears and pretend she was the Queen of America? She had this little speech about going to the bathroom, it was so cute. She called it “poopie”. I’m not supposed to tell that story, I guess. But doesn’t it show leadership potential?

Are you still there? I thought you hung up. Oh, you just muted it for a second. Is that someone else in the background? The whole office is listening in? Well, glad to see you’re taking me seriously. That’s an excellent decision on your part. Something else I learned from my Acer Aspire is that a person needs a good memory. There’s 4GB of SDRAM inside my Aspire, and 320GB in the SATA Hard Drive. Let me tell you, that’s just like my daughter. She has a great memory. When she was two, we had a greyhound that she just loved, and she said “Momma, one day I’m going to grow up and marry a greyhound.” And I said, “Honey, little girls can’t marry greyhounds.” And you know what? To this day, if I say the word “greyhound” for any reason, she instantly yells out “OH MY GOD, MOM, DON’T YOU DARE!” How many people remember something that strongly from way back when they were two? She’s amazing, that girl. You really should give her more responsibility.

Hello? Oh, that was mute again? You know, I can tell you were well trained because I can hear you smiling. Did you know people can hear when you’re smiling on the phone? It almost sounds like all of you are laughing. That must be a great place to work there at Whoops. Though you really should have more direct lines of communication. My Acer Aspire has a microphone and a webcam, plus gigabit LAN and a V.92 modem. If you could set up some sort of policy where your employees had the same thing, I could keep an eye on my daughter all day. You never know what kind of trouble children will get into. When she was six, she used to strip down to her underwear and play in the mud out back. Imagine if she did that in your office! The best thing possible is to make sure I’m there to guide her at all times. I got my Acer Aspire specifically for that reason. Why, right now, I’ve got a DVD full of her baby pictures in the Super-Multi drive.

The most embarrassing one? Well, that’s probably the one where she’s in the bathtub covered with tar and marmalade while wearing a birthday hat and crying. The story behind that one is- email? Sure, my Acer Aspire can do email. Oh, really? Employee of the Month? What an honor! Well, I guess I could send that photo if it’s for the bulletin board. You know, I’m glad you whoops people understand the bond between a mother and her child. Why, thank you, I will call at any time with more suggestions. Oh, yes, I’ve got plenty of stories about her, I could share them all day. Maybe I’ll type them all up on my Acer Aspire and get you a copy. Oh, don’t worry, I won’t say anything to my daughter about this. I wouldn’t want to spoil the surprise when she finds out she’s Employee of the Month! Thanks so much for working with me on this, whoops. Bye now.

Warranty: 90 Day Acer

Lubix Stereo Bluetooth HeadsetLubix Stereo Bluetooth Headset

The Lubix NC1 provides a convenient, wireless way to drown out our nagging suspicions that we’re merely cosmic dust motes adrift in an indifferent void. Lightweight, smushy earpieces won’t add to our crushing burden of existential despair. A choice of three colors briefly fools us into believing we are agents of our own destiny – the joke is on us when we discover that the headset is ugly in all three. And with multiple pairing support, we can listen to music on one device while taking calls on our phone. You know, in case somebody calls to give our petty and transient lives some sort of meaning.

We may have no control over our fate. But we do have control over our phone calls and music, right there on the earphones. Best of all, four 3D sound spatialization modes bring depth and definition to our digital music. If only they could do the same for our short, tragic lives.

Warranty: 1 Year Lubix

Features:

• Make phone calls and listen to music
• Unique pendant-style design keeps the headset always stays within reach without having to always stay in your ear
• Designed to be worn around the neck when not in use, the two earpieces snap together magnetically, forming a pendant with the cord as necklace
• Supports Advanced Audio Distribution Profile (A2DP), listen to stereo music over bluetooth
• Perfect for the New iPhone 3G S & OS 3.0
• Lightweight, silicone-cushioned earpieces fit naturally and securely in your ears
• Multiple pairing support, you can take a call on your mobile phone while listening to music from another device—the headset beeps to notify you of the phone call
• XEN™ 3D Sound, integrated digital signal processor offers four 3D sound modes for enhancing different types of music

XEN 3D Sound:

• LIVE: Simulates a live performance in a concert hall with judicious use of reverberation
• MEX: Delivers a wide stereo sound image while enhancing low frequencies to provide rich, deep bass tones
• WIDE: Presents a wide stereo sound image and produces a natural, soft 3D spatial effect
• XOME: Moves the spatial locus of the sound stage out of the head, simulating the use of loudspeakers

Additional Photos:

• Paired with iPhone OS 3.0 Playing Music
• White Lubix Bluetooth Stereo Headphones Pendant
• White Lubix Bluetooth Stereo Headphones Controls
• Blue Lubix Bluetooth Stereo Headphones Pendant
• Blue Lubix Bluetooth Stereo Headphones Controls
• Black Lubix Bluetooth Stereo Headphones Pendant
• Black Lubix Bluetooth Stereo Headphones Controls

Specifications:

• Wireless standard: Bluetooth 2.0 Class 2, Bluetooth 1.1
• Supported profiles: A2DP, AVRCP, HSP, HFP
• Operating time: 6 hrs talk / 5 hrs music playback / 150 hrs standby
• Max. output power: 10 mW + 10 mW
• Frequency response: 20 – 20,000 Hz ± 3 dB
• Sensitivity: 110 dB
• Wireless range: 33 ft. (10 m) maximum
• Power source: Lithium-polymer battery
• Recharge with USB cable or wall adaptor (both included)
• Size: 38mm x 42mm x 13mm
• Weight: 22g (0.8 oz)
• Colors: Available in white, black, and blue

In the box:

• Lubix NC1 Stereo Bluetooth Headset
•  AC Adapter
•  USB AC Cable
•  2 Earbud Rings
•  2 Earbud Foam Covers

Sling Media Slingbox SOLOSling Media Slingbox SOLO

Sanford & Sling

Believe me, being the governor of a small Southern state is no picnic at Fort Sumter. So every once in a while, I just need to drop out and get my head together, dig?

No security detail. No calls home to the wife. No statement to the press. Just a governor and his hiking boots and a pathway between the trees. It’s easy to forget that although I’m the biggest dog on the South Carolina porch, beyond all the pomp and circumstance, even a governor is only a man. Which is equivalent to, say, a medium-size dog. It’s humbling.

The only problem is, how do I keep up with my favorite TLC reality programming? Ask Lindsey Graham: if I miss even one episode of L.A. Ink or Say Yes To The Dress, I get awful grumpy. You don’t want to be on Death Row waiting for a pardon on those days, believe me.

Yeah, I know they’re on in reruns. Sure, I could TiVo them. But IT’S NOT THE SAME.

So whenever I disappear without explanation for days a time, I make sure I bring my WiFi-equipped laptop and hike to a hotspot by the time my stories come on. Thanks to the Slingbox SOLO, I can watch and control my home TV from just about anywhere there’s an Internet connection. A simple interface lets me watch, pause, rewind, and fast-forward my cable, satellite, DVR, or DVD player.

In an ideal world, I’d have even more mobility with the Slingbox iPhone app (sold separately). But since AT&T won’t allow SlingPlayer streaming over the 3G network, you still need to find a WiFi hotspot to watch your SlingBox on your iPhone. Sucks for me, but I’m sure AT&T just wants to keep their 3G network uncluttered. Or they’re working on a competing service. I even called AT&T to see if they’d make an exception for the gov, but they just tried to sell me a cable upgrade. I guess not even a governor can always get what he wants. Like I said, humbling.

Anyway, I guess it’s time to head back to civilization and put a few days in leading my state. I sure hope we haven’t been invaded by Georgia or something while I’ve been gone. But hey, if we have? You guys’ll have to work it out. I’m going hiking at an undisclosed location.

Warranty: 90 Day Sling Media

Screaming Mini Monkey KeychainScreaming Mini Monkey Keychain

Good For Your Keys, Mon.

Yes, that’s right. We made a whole run of these things so we could make that single, tiny joke in the title.

Maybe you’re a collector. Maybe you’re looking for a new way to hold your keys. Maybe you’re just a jerkface who wants an easy-to-carry annoyance machine. Well, it doesn’t matter who you are, the Woot Screaming Mini Monkey Keychain is perfect for you.

Unlike our normal Screaming Monkey, this monkeychain activates with a sharp push in the chest (just like a Texas barfight). But don’t worry, that doesn’t change the high quality Screaming Mini Monkey sound on bit! And look at those paws. Still perfect for shootin’!

Stop wondering where you tossed your keys. The Screaming Mini Monkey keychain will leave a path of sonic breadcrumbs for you to follow. Be the envy of your friends! Be the scourge of our enemies! Help us promote our brand in the most irritating way possible! Get a Screaming Mini Monkey keychain… right now!

Features:

• Slingshot-like rubber arms
• Keychain, a great place to put a key
• Majestic cape features equally majestic Woot logo
• Screams like the souls of the damned roasting over the fires of Hell

Centon 4GB USB Flash DriveCenton 4GB USB Flash Drive

See The CV

“I told you, if we need a male swimsuit model or a scorpion wrangler, we’ll let you know.”

“Very good, sir. I trust you don’t see many applicants who can offer such a unique combination of talents.”

“Fine, fine, right, yeah. You got a card or a portfolio or something?”

“Better than that, sir, I’ve got the Centon DSD4GB-010 Pink 4GB USB Flash Drive CH50233A.”

“What, now? What am I supposed to do with a pink flash drive?”

“You insert it into the USB port on your computer and find yourself transported to the world of me. It contains my unabridged resume, which runs to 83 pages including appendices; every known photograph of me ever taken; all 38 installments of my Arizona Public Radio series, Scorpion Minute; and a variety of videos showcasing my many other talents.”

“Great. Great.”

“There’s no better introduction to my life and work. A word of caution, though: if a file name says NSFW, it means it. Some of these may not even be safe for home. Thanks for your time, and enjoy the Centon DSD4GB-010 Pink 4GB USB Flash Drive CH50233A.”

Warranty: 2 Year Centon

Features:

• Made of genuine leather and is trimmed with stainless steel
• Unique cap is designed with a swivel connector to ensure that you do not loose it
• USB 2.0 interface (backwards compatible with USB 1.1)
• Full Speed 2.0 Data Transfers (Up to 480 Mbit/s)
• Compact and portable design
• Plug-and-Play
• LED indicator light
• No external power or battery needed