Invicta Men’s Speedway Collection ChronographInvicta Men’s Speedway Collection Chronograph

Tactical User-Centric Quality Vectors In Effect

If you’re reading this, you might be guilty of stealing our content. Please cover your eyes and give us some money.

To: All Department Heads
From: Woot HQ

It’s come to our attention that a great many people are here each day, enjoying our writeups and not actually paying for a single damn thing. In the past, we’ve considered these visitors as loss leaders. However, in these delicate times, our “little gifts of genius” (which is what we now call the writeups in lieu of giving the writers an actual raise) become low-hanging fruit, and we need a new mindset per the methodology. Our newly implemented paradigm gives us an opportunity to recontextualize our skill set until the synergy validates our transition and the peak optimization curve becomes a known good. We’ll be testing this new method alongside the sale of the Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch.

We picked the Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch as our go-to action item because it’s a really nice solid stainless steel chronograph. The 23 karat gold plating on gold tones will be stylish in almost any setting, and more than that, it’ll be useful. Water resistant to 200 meters, you’ll even be able to tell time in a flood. Additionally, we highly recommend every staffer purchase a Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch, as we will no longer accept “caught in a flood” as an excuse for tardiness. Please make your department aware of this change immediately!

We have been assured that this new method will not affect day to day performance. We’ll be using a brand new DRM-style program that allows an owner total and complete control over all his or her content. And by owner, we mean all of us who work with the lawyers, not the actual content creators. I mean, we’re not a charity, right? If they don’t want to fork it over they can go sling burgers. Oh, but we’re pleased with the “little gifts of genius” as well. We’re doing this for you, our most valued members of the team!

Our new system operates as follows: a visitor to the site immediately has a clear and present decision tree. They can buy the Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch and enjoy the Tritnite luminous hands and markers, naturally our ideal scenario, or they can walk away. Those who purchase the lovely Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch will immediately see a fantastic writeup. Wow, you would not believe how good this writeup is. Our boys have worked on it for a month, in our opinion it’s easily the best thing they’ve ever done. We think anybody who sees this will just freak out! How could you miss it? And those who don’t purchase an Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch will get to read this memo.

As the memo is a perfectly tolerable form of entertainment first invented by the Greeks, we feel that visitors will understand, and in fact come to quickly respect, our new structure. They can then feel free to enjoy the memo over and over again, for free, any time they like. However, if they want to see the actual writeup, they’ll have to buy an Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch.

Of course, on the first day of the test, we are expecting a few issues. Obviously one or two people will buy the Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch and then rush back to read the… wow, you really won’t believe how good this writeup is. How did they come up with those ideas? This is like the sixth time I’ve read it and it keeps getting funnier and- anyway, one or two people will maybe get caught in a tiny little bug we already totally know about and they’ll only see this memo even though they’ve already bought the watch. Crap happens. But for most people… wow, they’ll be so amazed that they’ll run and tell everyone on the forums how great the real writeup is, and all those people will have to buy watches, and soon, the whole world’s got an Invicta 9212 Men’s Gold Plated Stainless Steel Speedway Watch and our content is safe, except for those who’ve actually paid.

Assuming our new system works, the age of free information will finally be over. After we touch base in the post-survey validation period on Monday, we’ll likely be able to set the exploratory task force to work at sending out feelers to find those bold pioneers who, like us, understand that each thing you give away is a thing you can’t sell. We’re sure that, just like the Associated Press, our new direction will only serve to cement our reputation as an online leader that people can trust when they want content that they can’t ever tell anyone else about under any circumstance.

And most importantly, at the end of the day, it’ll conceptualize our accountability benchmarks towards a globalized cross-platform monetization-enabled knowledge-base. Really, isn’t that our target market anyway?

Warranty: One Year Invicta

Features:

• Series: Speedway
• Style: Chronograph
• Size: Men’s
• Case: 23Kt Gold Plate & Stainless Steel
• Bracelet: 23Kt Gold Plate & Stainless Steel
• Dial: White with three gold circled subdials
• Luminous: Hands and markers
• Other: Screw-down crown, pushers and case back
• Water resistant: 200 meters
• Crystal: Mineral
• Movement: Japan quartz
• Clasp: Deployment clasp with safety
• Case Dimensions: 40 mm diameter x 13 mm thick (44mm diameter with crown)
• Bracelet dimensions: 20 mm W x 9” L

In the box:

• Invicta 9212 Men’s Watch
• Instruction Manual

NatureMill Indoor PRO Edition ComposterNatureMill Indoor PRO Edition Composter

Yo No Maté A Mi Cachorro

Dear neighbor: it was nice to speak to you yesterday. Your English is coming along very well and you should be proud. But it’s important that you understand that I did not kill my puppy.

You see, when you started to ask me how my dog was, I could tell that you couldn’t remember the word for “dog”. Your gestures got the point across just fine. But given your difficulty with the language, I made the assumption that you wouldn’t be able to understand me if I said “He caught the parvo virus and passed away.” So I made what I hoped was the universal gesture for “dead”.

But your horrified reaction told me that you misunderstood what I meant by dragging my finger across my throat. I tried to explain that our puppy got sick and we were all very sad, but either you didn’t understand me or you had made your mind up that I was some kind of monster. I don’t blame you for fleeing inside your house. I would have, too, if I thought my seemingly normal next-door neighbor was the John Wayne Gacy of puppydom.

So please, accept this NatureMill Pro Indoor Composter as my way of saying “I’m not the kind of person who kills puppies.” In fact, I’m so not that kind of person that I carefully turn all of my food waste into soil-enriching, landfill-avoiding compost. Thanks to its onboard heater, it turns food waste into compost in just 2 weeks instead of the usual 2 or 3 months. The NatureMill Pro can accept up to 120 lbs. of biodegradable garbage every month. And the odor’s not bad, either, with the carbon filter. Here, you can see how it works for yourself.

Now, some wonder if it makes sense to use electricity to do something nature does on its own. Others point out that some people don’t have access to outdoor composting, or live somewhere too cold to compost year-round. The manufacturers say the NatureMill Pro Indoor Composter uses less energy than a truck would use to haul all that garbage away. It might not save the world by itself, but it’s just one small step toward a healthier planet for all of the puppies of tomorrow.

Which, let me state again, I do not kill.

Warranty: 3 Year Nature Mill

Features:

• Turn food waste into compost in about 2 weeks
• Use compost to enrich gardens, improve the soil around trees and shrubs, use as soil additive for house plants and planter boxes and as a protective mulch for trees and shrubs
• One batch of compost is sufficient for 10-40 sq ft (1-4 sq m) of a lawn or garden, applied once or twice per year
• Add compostable food waste at any time, on any day
• Uses “hot composting” conditions: mixing, air flow, heat, and moisture. The energy released destroys odors, pathogens, and seed germination
• More than seventy percent of the initial waste disappears into thin air, as compost cultures convert it into water vapor. What’s left is a very concentrated compost fertilizer
• Fresh compost has a mild organic aroma, which people often describe as damp wool, sourdough bread, or mushrooms. You can use it immediately, or leave it in a heap outdoors until you are ready to work in your garden
• Stainless steel internal components for continuous heavy duty use
• Ideal for large families, gourmet cooks, offices, or small restaurants
• Foot pedal for convenient hands-free operation
• Vacation mode – automatically activates after a period of inactivity to conserve energy, and optimize heat and mixing for curing
• Powerful carbon filter guaranteed for life, removes any lingering odors
• Security locking feature for public areas such as offices or restaurants (padlock not included)
• A fan draws air into the machine continuously, providing oxygen to the cultures decomposing the waste and a powerful carbon filter removes any lingering odors
• Balance the chemistry by adding a small amount of sawdust to increase “brown” content, and baking soda to reduce acidity
• Indoor or outdoor use, even in cold weather, rain, or snow
• Add food waste any time, any day, up to 120 lbs per month
• Waste items are processed continuously, mixing every 4 hours, until they are completely ground down to small particles
• Compost is ready every 2 weeks
• A red light will tell you when to empty the machine
• To empty machine, open the door and remove the compost
• Handles pet waste, kitty litter, and cage beddings
• Energy use is just 5 kwh / month, or about $0.50/month – less than a garbage truck would burn in diesel fuel to haul the same waste

Specifications:

• Size and weight: 20” high x 20” deep x 12” wide (51×51x30cm); 17 lbs (8 kg)
• Capacity: 120 lbs (55 kg) organic waste per month. Add items any time, any day. Ideal for a family of 5, or a single individual living alone.
• Waste materials: Accepts most food waste items. Avoid hard item such as bones, and fiberous items such as corn cobs and corn husks. See detailed list
• External Temperatures: Use in any location 0-120F (18-50C)
• Internal Temperatures: Up to 140F (60C) reactor temperatures
• Rate of compost production: One batch every 2 weeks, depending on actual usage. An indicator light signals when to remove compost.
• Finished product: High nitrogen compost a soil amendment for lawns, gardens, trees, or potted plants. Compost is ready to use.
• Compaction: 70% or more, volume and weight reduction, due to bio-degrading (composting) and mechanical breakdown
• Construction External housing: recycled + recyclable energy-efficient polypropylene (stamped with the “5” triangle recycling symbol)
• Food-grade stainless steel and aluminum internal components
• Installation: No installation is required. Plug into a standard power outlet. For outdoor use, keep power supply dry.
• Cleaning and Maintenance: Wipe the hopper and exterior with a moist towel. Rinse the cure tray and drip tray when you empty them. Do not disturb the compost cultures in the reactor chamber. Do not use soaps or chemicals
• UL and CE compliant

Additional Photos:

• NatureMill HC52CA Black Indoor Automatic Composter PRO Edition
• Front Control Panel
• Mixing Chamber
• Cure Tray
• Wood Pellets and Baking Soda
• Cut Away Illustration

In the box:

• NatureMill HC52CA Black Indoor Automatic Composter PRO Edition
• Floor Tray
• Power Supply
• Drip Tray
• Cure Tray
• Cure Door
• Pure Baking Soda
• Wood Pellets
• Measuring Tray

Ion Audio USB TurntableIon Audio USB Turntable

To Be Played At Maximum Volume

Put the needle on the record and the drum beat goes like this

Great-grandad has a great collection of big band 78s. Grandad has those great Sinatra LPs. Dad has all those punk rock 45s. And here you are, clutching an iPod and wishing you could listen to any of it. But you can’t listen, can you? You can’t listen and you’re trapped with whatever they’ve got today at the iTunes store. Hope you like Ashley Tisdale as much as Steve does.

If you don’t, 21st Century Boy or Girl, you’ve pretty much only got two options. One is to ship those albums to someone like Girl Talk or Peanut Butter Wolf and hope they sample all the good parts. The other is to buy a Ion Audio TTUSB USB Turntable. With just a few quick button pushes, you can start recording vinyl right into MP3s. You can handle LPs or 45s right out of the box, and the included software will let you figure out 78s. There’s even an adjustable anti-skate control for when you don’t want to hear any skater music.

The Ion Audio TTUSB USB Turntable is belt driven, exactly like the decks that professional world class DJ’s refuse to buy. But someone is paying them a few thousand every gig, so there you go. Those of us who aren’t going to scratch out Flight of the Bumblebees might be perfectly happy with a belt drive.

If you don’t have a computer, the Ion Audio TTUSB USB Turntable plugs right in to a stereo and provides enjoyment as a plain ol’ turntable. But if you do have a computer (if you’re here without a computer please tell us your secret), the Ion Audio TTUSB USB Turntable will serve as an excellent method to turn those worthless old records into worthless new MP3s that you wish you’d never wasted the time to make. There’s a reason some of these things never get reissued, you know.

If you’re looking to enjoy records in the dorm, or records on the porch, or records in the record department of your local City Hall, don’t buy an expensive turntable that sounds amazing only when you’re sitting in a specially designed, perfectly balanced orchestra pit. Buy an Ion Audio TTUSB USB Turntable and watch that vinyl turn into a far more portable format. Plus if you jump up and down it’s just like having a shuffle button.

Warranty: 90 Day Ion Audio

Features:

• Rediscover your records and take your music to go
• An innovative turntable with USB connection enabling the transfer of music from records to computer
• Play records on your home stereo
• Plug and Play USB connection: no drivers needed!
• Turn your records into MP3s
• Listen to your music on your computer, record it to CD, or transfer it to your iPod or MP3 player
• Connects with ease to your home stereo with a switchable-level output
• Connects to stereo, even if there is no phono input – no preamp required!
• Exclusive software suite gives you a powerful set of tools that make transferring your music easy
• EZ Vinyl Converter is the best way to record and convert vinyl directly to your iTunes music library
• PC users can download a Free version of EZ Vinyl Converter with Gracenote® MusicID technology which automatically adds album, artist, and song information for you
• Audacity software enables you to edit and clean your recorded tracks
• 33 1/3 and 45 RPM settings
• Records 78 RPM albums using included software
• Adjustable anti-skate control for increased stereo balancing
• Switchable-level RCA output
• 1/8”-stereo line input digitize music from cassettes or other sources
• Belt Driven with Belt Pre-Installed

Additional Photos:

• Ion Audio USB Turntable
• Profile View
• 1/8" Stereo Input and Speed Controls
• Cartridge
• Rear Panel

In the box:

• Ion Audio TTUSB USB Turntable
• Slipmat
• 45RPM adapter
• Cartridge with pre-assembled stylus
• USB cable
• Audio cables, attached
• Power cable, attached
• Software CD
• Quick start guide

Philips Active Noise Canceling HeadphonesPhilips Active Noise Canceling Headphones

The Question Is Mute

Ah, the song of the city. The cooing of pigeons, the quarrels of lovers, the chiming of church bells, the roar of bus engines – the symphony of life, discordant and eternal. Yeah, screw all that.

It’s got a lousy beat and you can’t dance to it. If the city sounds so great, why are all these people running around with MP3 players? Why is “I Gotta Feeling” the top iTunes download right now? Forget about the city sounding better than your favorite band. The city can’t even beat the Black-Eyed Peas.

Clearly, cities should be lived in and not heard. So plug up your noise-holes with these Philips Noise Canceling Earbuds. No, they won’t drown out that bone saw or that trombone or those howler monkeys – what is your neighbor doing up in that apartment, anyway? But they’re great for muffling the nonspecific hum that arises when you cram millions of people, machines, and animals together.

And like John Candy, they’re at their best in planes, trains, and automobiles. Even the most hushed, ethereal acoustic elegy will come through loud and clear, thanks to compact noise-canceling electronics that Philips says will reduce unwanted ambient noise by 70%. Our tests reveal it’s more like 67%, which would upset us if we weren’t totally lying about running our own tests.

So drown out as much of the urban cacophony as your preferred killer jams can handle. The Philips Noise Canceling Earbuds will take care of the rest. But keep your eyes open and your wits about you – one of those buses you’re not hearing might be headed right at you.

Warranty: 1 Year Philips

Features:

• Compact electronics reduce unwanted external noise by 70%
• Enjoy soft music on flights and in trains and similar places without hearing a distracting buzz in the background
• Creates a perfect seal for perfect sound and significantly reduces unwanted background noise
• Enjoy music with or without the noise canceling feature enabled
• Designed to wear in front  or around your neck for convenience
• Split cable design from noise canceling module to ear buds with adjustable sliding grommet
• Sliding grommet for adjustable cable tension around neck
• Small noise canceling control box makes bulky control boxes unnecessary
• Sliding On/Off switch on noise canceling module
• 3.5” adapter connects to all types of audio devices
• A 60” long cable that is ideal for outdoor use

Sound:

• Acoustic system: Open
• Active noise attenuation: 50-1500 Hz, >10 dB at 300 Hz
• Diaphragm: Mylar dome
• Frequency response: 40 – 20,000 Hz
• Impedance: 72 Ohm at 1 kHz 72 Ohm
• Magnet type: Neodymium
• Maximum power input: 15 mW
• Noise canceling effect: ~10 dB at 300 Hz
• Sensitivity: 102 dB
• Speaker diameter: 9 mm
• Type: Dynamic
• Voice coil: Copper
• Power: One AAA Battery (Included)

Connectivity:

• Connector: 3.5 mm stereo
• Finishing of connector: Chrome-plated
• Type of cable: OFC

Product Dimensions:

• Overall Cable length (including in-line noise canceling module): 60”
• In-line noise canceling module: 3”(L) X 1 1/2”(H) X 3/4”(D)
• Cable length from module to plug: 25”
• Cable length from module to ear buds: 32”

Additional Pictures:

• Philips SHN2500 Active Noise Canceling Headphones
• Grommett Adjusts Cable Tension
• In-Line Noise Canceling Module
• On/Off Switch on Noise Canceling Module

In the box:

• Philips SHN2500 Noise Canceling Headphones
• Philips Powerlife AAA Ultra Alkaline Battery

Sunpak Platinum Plus Tripod – $5.99Sunpak Platinum Plus Tripod

Tripod No-No

My dad was all “You tampered with your sister’s birthday list.” Tampered, like I put, like, a needle in her candy bar or something. So now I’m, like, grounded for, like, ever. But it was still totally worth it.

It’s her own fault. She totally thought it was, like, funny to put that picture of me on Facebook. The one from when I was, like, twelve where I’m picking my nose in the swimming pool. Like she never picks her nose. So anyway, I just, like, added a couple of letters to her birthday list when she wasn’t looking. Just, like, a T and an R, so it said “tripod”.

On her birthday, it was, like, so funny to watch her open that Sunpak Platinum Plus Tripod. Mom and Dad were totally, like, smiling and everything like they got her some great present, and she was all like “Um, what?” And Dad went “It’s that tripod you asked for! See, it’s got a smooth-turning three-way pan head and a 3.3-pound load capacity. The guy at the camera store said that was pretty good.” Then she goes, like, “I don’t even have a camera, I wanted an iPod” and they totally have this big argument and it totally, like, ruined my sister’s birthday. It was, like, awesome.

Then they looked at the list and, like, figured out my handwriting. So I, like, totally got in trouble. All I ever do is, like, sit in my room and, like, listen to music anyway, so it doesn’t even, like, matter and I don’t even care…hey, have you, like, seen my iPod?

Warranty: 1 Year Sunpak

Features:

• Three-way ultra smooth photo/video pan head
• Quick release plate with a video indexing pin
• Pan head bubble level
• Geared center column with tension adjustment
• Body bubble level
• D-shape three-section legs with flip lever leg locks and heavy-duty self-leveling rubber feet
• Leg braces for added stability on uneven surfaces

Specifications:

• Max height: 52.0” (132.0 cm)
• Min Height: 19.0” (48.2 cm)
• Folded Length: 20.5” (52.0 cm)
• Weight: 1.8lb (0.8 kg)
• Load Capacity: 3.3lb (1.5kg)
• Leg Diameter: 0.75” (19.0mm)
• Leg Sections: 3

Additional Photos:

• Three-Section Legs Extended
• Three-Way Panhead
• Quick release plate with a video indexing pin

In the box:

• Sunpak 5200D Platinum Plus Tripod
• Quick release plate with a video indexing pin

Queen Size Memory Foam MattressQueen Size Memory Foam Mattress

Meow Meow Meow

Cookies. They’re in your browser even now. They’re in your laptop, in your phone, even in your cookie jar. So why not in your bed?

The Sarah Peyton Queen Size Memory Foam Mattress combines the usefulness of cookies with the comfort of… a pile of kittens or something. That’s really more a marketing question anyway. We’re focusing on the technology involved. And rest assured, the Sarah Peyton Queen Size Memory Foam Mattress is as high-tech as mattresses get.

First of all, the special Memory Foam is naturally antimicrobial, which is like having a virus checker built into your bed. Also please remember that one of the definitions of “like” is “similar but not exactly” because that’s gonna save us a lot of whining from biologists. Seriously, don’t you people have tenure to chase? Microbes, viruses, who cares? Just get back to faking evolution in the lab until the Rapture hits.

Secondly, each Sarah Peyton Queen Size Memory Foam Mattress has the support you need for a great night’s sleep. And best of all, it learns, shaping itself to your body’s specific needs in the same way a spell checker slowly learns you’re not trying to type the words “ducking coalsucker” over and over again. You’ll soon be having a more supportive sleep that meets all flammability requirements. And the cover can be machine washed and dried!

Choose between two different heights of Soft Luxury with a pillow top that’s soft like really fat kittens, or the no frills Traditional that’s soft like… grumpy kittens. Really, you should come back when the writers are working, they’re better at the “like” thing than we are. All we know is that in any version, the Sarah Peyton Queen Size Memory Foam Mattress is a good night’s sleep waiting to happen.

Oh, best of all, it comes vacuum sealed, so when you open it, you get to watch it expand. You could have some friends over and not tell them what you’re about to do and then start yelling RISE! RISE MY MATTRESS MINION! and it would be awesome. Well, slow awesome, since it takes up to 72 hours for the whole rising thing to finish. What are we, bakers? It’ll be ready when it’s ready.

Warranty: Shipping Defects Only; Due to the personal nature of this product, we do not accept returns

Features:

• Soft Luxury Memory Foam Mattress combines next-generation memory foam and energy absorbing Intellifoam on a polyurethane base
• Bedding system relieves pressure and offers customized comfort
• Molds to your body eliminating uncomfortable pressure points
• Never needs turning
• Can be used with existing box springs or platform
• Meets all flammability standards
• Washable mattress cover is moisture-resistant
• Aloe-Vera treated mattress cover feels like cashmere
• Memory Foam is resistant to dust mites and naturally anti-microbial
• Standard queen-size sheets fit all three mattresses

Mattress Cover:

• 100% Cotton
• Moisture resistant
• Zipper opening for easy removal
• Machine washable and dryable
• Non-flammable cover included

12” Soft Luxury Memory Foam Mattress:

• Top Layer Density: 3” 4lb Visco Memory Foam Pillow Top
• Bottom Layer Density: 9” Polyurethane Base Foam Pillow Top with Air Flow
• Air flow system has ventilating air ducts to create softness while maintaining balanced support
• Mattress Height: 12”
• Queen: 60 inches x 80 inches x 12 inches

10” Soft Luxury Memory Foam Mattress:

• Top Layer Density: 2.5” 4lb Visco Memory Foam Pillow Top
• Bottom Layer Density: 7.5” Polyurethane Base Foam Pillow Top with Air Flow
• Air flow system has ventilating air ducts to create softness while maintaining balanced support
• Mattress Height: 10”
• Queen: 60 inches x 80 inches x 10 inches

10” Memory Foam Mattress Traditional:

• Top Layer Density: 2.5” 4lb Visco Memory Foam
• Bottom Layer Density: 7.5” Polyurethane Base Foam
• Mattress Height: 10”
• Queen: 60 inches x 80 inches x 10 inches

Care Instructions:

• To maximize memory foam expansion; remove from packaging within 72 hours of receipt
• Shipped vacuum sealed and compacted; once received, allow for expansion in a well ventilated area to remove chemical smell associated with compression
• Allow mattress to expand in an open space for full recovery
• Expands to original shape in up to 72 hours
• Due to the nature of Memory Foam, the firmness level of every item is unique. Please be advised that even similar products may produce different firmness results
• Mattress is spot clean only

In the box:

• Sarah Peyton Queen Size Memory Foam Mattress

iGo Universal AC/DC Power AdapteriGo Universal AC/DC Power Adapter

See this phone, the battery’s dead

Who the blue blazes is Giacomo?

My smartphone and your smartphone
Were runnin’ low on power
Plugged mine in to this thing I own
And talked for another hour

Hey now! Hey now!
iGo, iGo whatsit
I can plug stuff into the DC
Jack in my Honda Fit

Look at these photographs I snapped
iGo, iGo-ma-bob
I can charge my camera ‘cause I can adapt
The power to the charge-up job

Hey now! Hey now!
iGo, iGo gadget
I can charge up from almost any plug
And dictate how much juice I get

My laptop and your laptop
Waitin’ for deplaning
I was writing email, but you had to stop
‘Cause your battery was draining

Hey now! Hey now!
iGo, iGo thingie
I can use AC or DC
Electricity

See the changeable power tips?
iGo, iGo doohicky
I have the right one for any machine
See, machines are sometimes picky

Hey now! Hey now!
iGo, iGo adaptor
I can change AC to DC
Or the opposite, if that’s apter

Warranty: 2 Year iGo

Features:

• AC and DC units allows you to power and rapidly charge your SmartPhone or iPhone from any standard wall or auto outlet
• Interchangeable power tips with patented tip technology allow you to power multiple gadgets with a single adapter
• Choose between Smartphone (mini USB) version or iPhone/iPod version (Other tips sold separately)
• Compact and lightweight design with convenient retractable cord and travel organizer
• Charges up to 8 times faster than USB and trickle chargers

Wall (AC) Unit Specifications:

• Output Voltage: 3.1-9 VDC
• Output Power: Up to 8 Watts continuous
• Input Voltage: 100-240 VAC
• Output Current: 1.5A Max
• Dimensions: 3.25” x 2.00” x 1.00” (82.55mm x 50.80mm x 25.40mm)

Auto (DC) Unit Specifications:

• Output Voltage: 3.1-9 VDC
• Output Power: Up to 8 Watts continuous
• Input Voltage: 11.0 – 16.5 VDC
• Output Current: 1.5A Max
• Dimensions: 3.63” x 1.00” x 1.00” (92.20mm x 25.40mm x 25.40mm)

Retractable Cord:

• Case Dimensions: 2.17” x 2.60” x 0.93” (55.10mm x 66.04mm x 23.62mm)
• Cord Length: 5.0 Feet (1.52m)

Additional Photos:

• iGo Universal AC/DC Power Adapter SmartPhone (Mini USB) Detailed Photo
• iGo Universal AC/DC Power Adapter iPhone/iPod Detailed Photo
• Retractable Cable
• SmartPhone (Mini USB) Using DC Adapter
• SmartPhone (Mini USB) Using AC Adapter
• SmartPhone (Mini USB) in Travel Pouch
• iPhone/iPod Using DC Adapter
• iPhone/iPod Using AC Adapter
• iPhone/iPod in Travel Pouch

In the box:

• Wall (AC) Unit
• Auto (DC) Unit
• Retractable Cord
• Travel Organizer
• User Guide
• Mini USB Tip or iPhone/iPod tip (your choice)

United Artists 90th Anniversary Essential Collection with 30 DVD MoviesUnited Artists 90th Anniversary Essential Collection with 30 DVD Movies

The Longest Story Ever Told

“Morning, Al. I said good morning, Al! Al, I’m talkin’ at you, buddy!”

“What? Oh, Morning, Bobby.”

“You sure seem out of it today, Al. Long night?”

“Well… sort of. I saw this movie but… I still can’t figure it out. It was really deep, I bet a million people worked on it.”

“Oh, really? What was it about?”

“Well, that’s kind of the trouble. It starts with this Italian-American butcher who’s trying to find a wife. But then he kills a guy and a jury debates his fate. Right before they pass sentence, he escapes with his best friend and they dress as women and hide with an all-girl band who wind up fighting the Mexican Army.”

“Wow, that’s-

“Wait, wait, that’s just the beginning. After the war, one of them gets an apartment in New York and executives use it to cheat on their wives. This gets noticed by a group of seven cowboys who join forces to clean up the place, and then there’s a war crimes trial. And in the meantime, two rival gangs start a dance-off!”

“I think I know what you-”

“Then one of the gang members goes to Alcatraz, which turns out to be a hidden island fortress infiltrated by James Bond, but not in time to stop them from brainwashing a soldier to assassinate the President. The only people who can help are a team of imprisoned soliders, but they first have to steal a rare diamond from under the nose of an inept police detective. And that’s just the first half!”

“Al, let me ask you, was this movie spread across over forty DVD discs?”

“Yeah! It was! I figured it was just an art flick.”

“And Al, did it end with a boxer past his prime preparing for a fight that would be observed by a pair of brothers who went on a trip to Vegas while James Bond fought against a gay couple who wanted Charlton Heston to help the people of Rwanda?”

“You’ve seen it!”

“Al, you idiot, you watched the United Artists 90th Anniversary DVD Collection. Thirty different movies like Rocky and Midnight Cowboy and The Magnificent Seven and West Side Story and The Alamo.”

“What? No, no, I clearly remember a magical flying car that Steve McQueen wanted to steal.”

“That was Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and The Thomas Crown Affair. Al. Tell me something, how long have you been awake?”

“Well, some of these discs have bonus features, so I guess about three or four days straight.”

“And you never wondered why the movie was so long? Or why it had three different people playing James Bond in Dr. No, The Spy Who Loved Me and Goldeneye? Or why it kept going from color to black and white?”

“I just figured it was a multi-generational epic.”

“A multi-generational epic that contained some of Hollywood’s greatest dead movie stars?”

“Well… maybe, CGI…”

“I pity you, Al. I pity everyone you come in contact with. You don’t deserve a United Artists 90th Anniversary DVD Collection Boxed Set.”

“Oh! i just figured out Dustin Hoffman’s character! He’s a pimp with pneumonia that turned into autism! Oh, sorry, sorry, I guess that was a spoiler, huh?”

“That’s Midnight Cowboy and Rainman, Al. Go take a nap.”

Features:

• 30 United Artist movies adding up to approximately 66 hours of Hollywood entertainment
• Hardcover binder in full color with movie art collage on front and back
• Two pages dedicated to each movie with DVD stored in a molded sleeve on the left page, the right page displays theater movie poster and a shows a screen shot from the movie
• Chronological order by year of when the movie was released
• Overview of the lifespan of each movie, tells you award nominations, director, writer, synopsis of the movie
• 7 of these films won the Academy Award for Best Picture
• 14 of these films won at least 1 Academy Award
• These movies combined to win over 40 Academy Awards
• All DVDs are widescreen format (Five also include standard format version)

Additional Photos:

• DVD Box Set Cover
• United Artists 90th Anniversary Essential Collection with 30 DVD Movies

In the Book:
Disc 1: Marty P&S
Disc 2: Twelve Angry Men WS
Disc 3: Some Like It Hot WS Disc 1
Disc 4: Some Like It Hot Disc 2
Disc 5: The Alamo
Disc 6: The Apartment
Disc 7: The Magnificent Seven Disc 1
Disc 8: The Magnificent Seven Disc 2
Disc 9: Judgment at Nuremberg
Disc 10: West Side Story Disc 1
Disc 11: Westside Story WS Disc 2
Disc 12: Birdman of Alcatraz
Disc 13: Dr. No Disc 1
Disc 14: Dr. No WS Disc 2
Disc 15: Manchurian Candidate
Disc 16: The Great Escape Disc 1
Disc 17: The Great Escape Disc 2
Disc 18: The Pink Panther
Disc 19: The Greatest Story Ever Told Disc 1
Disc 20: The Greatest Story Ever Told Disc 2
Disc 21: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly Disc 1
Disc 22: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly Disc 2
Disc 23: Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Disc 1
Disc 24: Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Disc 2
Disc 25: Thomas Crown Affair (1968)
Disc 26: The Battle of Britain Disc 1
Disc 27: The Battle of Britain Disc 2
Disc 28: Midnight Cowboy Disc 1
Disc 29: Midnight Cowboy Disc 2
Disc 30: Fiddler on the Roof Disc 1
Disc 31: Fiddler on the Roof Disc 2
Disc 32: Rocky Disc 1
Disc 33: Rocky Disc 2
Disc 34: Annie Hall
Disc 35: A Bridge Too Far Disc 1
Disc 36: A Bridge Too Far Disc 2
Disc 37: The Spy Who Loved Me Disc 1
Disc 38: The Spy Who Loved Me Disc 2
Disc 39: Raging Bull Disc 1
Disc 40: Raging Bull Disc 2
Disc 41: Rain Man
Disc 42: Goldeneye Disc 1
Disc 43: Goldeneye Disc 2
Disc 44: The Birdcage
Disc 45: Bowling for Columbine
Disc 46: Hotel Rwanda

Zune 80GB Multimedia Player & Home Audio/Video PackZune 80GB Multimedia Player & Home Audio/Video Pack

What If They Threw A Social And Nobody Came?

Hey, check out the Zune’s great social features! Wireless song sharing, picture sharing, podcast sharing…now all I need is another Zune owner to share with. Hello? Anybody out there? Hello?

Warranty: 90 Day Microsoft

Zune 80GB Features:

• 80 GB capacity. Holds up to 20,000 songs, or 25,000 pictures, or 250 hours of video
• Beautiful, big screen. Featuring a 3.2-inch color screen, Zune 80GB is perfect for portable video viewing
• Premium headphones. Big screens are great for videos, but premium headphones are essential for music. Included with Zune 80GB are headphones designed to block out external noise
• Touch controls. Kiss slow scrolling goodbye. The innovative new Zune pad makes browsing your device a blast. Fly effortlessly through your music, picture, and video collections
• Wireless sync. Cut the cord to your PC. Refresh your Zune with new content anytime you charge your device, through your home wireless network
• Wireless Zune-to-Zune sharing. Share full-length tracks of your favorite songs, albums, playlists, pictures and even audio podcasts. Listen to the full track of any song you receive up to three times, and even pass along songs you receive to other friends nearby who have a Zune. If you like a song you receive, you can easily add it to your wish list and then buy it from your PC the next time you sync
• TV and movies to go. Zune Marketplace now offers more than 600 popular TV shows to download and own. Zune will import unprotected .WMV, .MPG4 and H.264 files into your video library. Also, if you’re recording TV shows or movies with Windows Media Center in Windows Vista, you can import and sync them to your device. Load up your favorite videos and hit the road
• Built-in FM radio. Tune in to one of your favorite local stations while on the go or working out. Advanced tuning capabilities let you see the name of the song currently playing on select frequencies
• Zune Marketplace. Featuring over 3 million songs, DRM-free MP3s, music videos, audio/video podcasts and more, your store is always open and just a mouse click away. Learn more
• Your games. Your music. Your way. Plug your Zune into your Xbox 360 and customize the soundtrack in your favorite games. You can also stream content in Zune software to your Xbox 360 using a wireless connection
• Buy from FM radio. Instantly purchase songs you hear on FM radio stations directly from your Zune device. If you are in a Wi-Fi hotspot, the song will immediately download to your Zune. If not, you will have a queue of songs ready to purchase when you sync to your home computer. Buy from FM works with radio stations that broadcast RDS and RT Plus data—the same technology that shows the song titles and information on FM radio stations you listen to in your car
• Wirelessly browse and buy on the fly. Browse and purchase tracks from the Zune Marketplace online store directly from your device when in a Wi-Fi hotspot or through a home wireless network
• Audiobooks. To start listening to your favorite book on your Zune, visit audible.com or overdrive.com to sync your favorites
• Games on the go. Free games will keep you entertained on the go

Zune 80GB Specifications:

• Size: 61.1 mm x 108.2 mm x 12.9 mm (w x h x d)
• Weight: 4.5 ounces (128 grams)
• Music, up to 24 hours (wireless off); video, up to 4 hours
• Charge Time: 3 hours; 2 hours to 90 percent
• Screen Size Size: 3.2-inch color display
• Screen Type: Scratch-resistant glass
• Screen Orientation: Vertical (music) and horizontal (pictures and videos)
• Screen Resolution: 320 pixels x 240 pixels
• Audio Suppport: Windows Media® Audio Standard (WMA) (.wma): Up to 320 Kbps; constant bit rate (CBR) and variable bit rate (VBR) up to 48-kHz sample rate. WMA Pro 2-channel up to 384 Kbps; CBR and VBR up to 48-kHz
• WMA Lossless
• Advanced Audio Coding (AAC) (.mp4, .m4a, .m4b, .mov) – .m4a and .m4b files without FairPlay DRM up to 320 Kbps; CBR and VBR up to 48-kHz
• MP3 (.mp3) – Up to 320 Kbps; CBR and VBR up to 48-kHz
• Photo Support: JPEG – (.jpg)
• Windows Media Video (WMV) (.wmv) – Main and Simple Profile, CBR or VBR, up to 3.0 Mbps peak video bit rate; 720 pixels x 480 pixels up to 30 frames per second (or 720 pixels x 576 pixels up to 25 frames per second). Zune software will transcode HD WMV files at device sync
• MPEG-4 (MP4/M4V) (.mp4) Part 2 video – Simple Profile up to 2.5 Mbps peak video bit rate; 720 pixels x 480 pixels up to 30 frames per second (or 720 pixels x 576 pixels up to 25 frames per second). Zune software will transcode HD MPEG-4 files at device sync
• H.264 video – Baseline Profile up to 2.5 Mbps peak video bit rate; 720 pixels x 480 pixels up to 30 frames per second (or 720 pixels x 576 pixels up to 25 frames per second). Zune software will transcode HD H.264 files at device sync
• DVR-MS – Zune software will transcode at time of sync
• Wireless Connectivity: 802.11b/g compatible
• Wireless Range: Up to 30 feet
• In range, see other Zune users, see their “now playing” status (when enabled on a given Zune), and send and receive songs and pictures
• Connectivity: 802.11b/g compatible
• Authentication modes: Open, WEP, WPA, and WPA2
• Encryption modes: WEP 64- and 128-bit, TKIP, and AES

Zune Home A/V Pack Features:

• Wirelessly control Zune. The wireless remote gives you full access to your Zune device from anywhere in the room.
• Charge and play. Charge your Zune while you listen to music. The Zune Dock includes a longer cable to accommodate your home setup, and the Zune AC adapter is optimized to fit into most power strips by taking up less room.
• Small and convenient AC adapter. Half the size of the original, the new smaller Zune AC Adapter is more portable and easily fits into crowded power strips. For added convenience, the cable plugs into the side so you can fit it behind dressers and tables.
• Display photos and video on your TV. Zune 80 and Zune 120 have the ability to use your TV as a display for viewing photos and video. Just plug the included composite AV output cable into your TV.
• Component output for Zune 80 and Zune 120. For Zune 80 and Zune 120 owners, you can purchase component video cables to watch movies in 480i using this kit.

Additional Photos:

• Zune 80 Music Menu
• Zune 80 Games
• Zune 80 Radio Display
• Home A/V Pack
• Remote for Home A/V Pack
• Dock for Home A/V Pack
• Removable Back plate for Dock
• Component Connections on Back of Dock

In the box:

Zune 80

• Premium headphones
• Zune Sync Cable
• Three pairs of foam earpiece covers

Zune Home A/V Pack

• Zune Dock
• Three faceplates (one for each device type)
• Zune Wireless Remote
• Zune AC Adapter
• Zune A/V Output Cable

Discuss this product

Chop and Grate Set – 2 PackChop and Grate Set – 2 Pack

An Offer We’d Rather Refuse

Hi, it’s Vince with- well, you know who I’m with. I’m in a great mood because I’ve been slapping my troubles away, and I’m hoping you guys aren’t the next one I need to slap.

Look, I know where you guys are coming from. You’re out here hustling a buck like the rest of us, you got nerve, you got ca-joanies, I appreciate that. Now you appreciate this: take that damn chopper down off your web page or I’ll use it to sprinkle your ca-joanies on my hot fudge sundae.

I mean, come on. You think you’re fooling anybody with this “Chop & Grate Set”? You stick the carrots or the onion or whatever the hell in the little circle, you slap it, it chops. You guys even throw in the little cheese grater. I mean, come on. Don’t crap on my rye toast and tell me it’s tuna fish, all right? Tell you this, I’m not just going to sit here while you guys undercut my prices. You think you’re real smart doubling everybody’s order and being all upfront about the shipping charges, huh? Don’t make me remind you what happened to the last guy who tried to sell a chopper like this. You seen him on TV lately, huh? One slap at a time, that’s all I’m saying.

Look, I’m not a bad guy. You wanna be friends, I’m all kisses. But you bite me and here come the slaps. I go nuts. And you’re not gonna love me nuts. So think long and hard about how quickly and finely and easily and violently this chopper reduces meat to shreds. You following me, camera guy?

Warranty: 90 Day Woot Limited Warranty

Chopper Features:

• Chops fruits, vegetables, nuts, cheese, herbs, ice, and just about anything that will fit within a 3 inch diameter
• Cutting blades rotate with each press for maximum power and performance
• 3 inch self contained base allows for easy chopping with or without a cutting board
• Dishwasher safe blades and parts open up for easy cleaning
• Chopper dimensions: 11” tall 3” diameter

Grater Features:

• Large and small size grater screens included
• Screens attach with cotter pin for easy swapping and cleaning
• Easy to use: Place cheese inside grater, push and turn cheese through grater with lid stopper
• Great for salads, omelettes or quesadillas
• Place next to the salt and pepper at the dinner table
• Grater dimensions: 6” tall 3” diameter
• Dishwasher safe blades and parts open up for easy cleaning

Additional Photos:

• Chop and Grate Set
• Chopper Disassembled
• Grater Disassembled
• Apple Chopped with the Chopper

In the box:

• 2 Choppers
• 2 Graters
• 2 Chopping Cups
• 2 Large and Small Grating Screens